Sometimes it is hard for the involved spouse to see the full spectrum of consequences of his or her actions at first. Since you are seeking counseling, you are already aware of the strain infidelity can bring on a marriage. An affair can have several effects on your marriage, including:
- The inability to trust your partner as well as a loss of intimacy.
- Extreme insecurity and feeling inadequate in your marriage.
- Tension and conflict that may stem from unresolved issues leading up to an affair.
- Chaos at home that affects children by causing sadness, confusion, and anxiety.
As one of the leading causes of divorce, infidelity must be addressed immediately with a marriage counselor for the best chance of healing and moving forward with Christ.
Part 3: The Road to Recovery
Angela and Scott went to Christian counseling for infidelity recovery with hopes of rebuilding their marriage, but it wasn’t easy. Angela couldn’t stop the thoughts and images that consumed her, and sleep was a thing of the past. She had so many questions. She felt worthless, undesirable, and afraid. Scott was overcome with grief. After seeing the impact the affair had on Angela, he could hardly live with himself. He loved Angela and wished more than anything that he could take back his choices and make her pain go away.
The repercussions of infidelity can be complicated and messy. Christian counseling for recovery can help both parties work through the chaos of deceit and rebuild their marriage through faith and understanding. For more information on how to overcome the immense obstacles often presented in these situations, please contact Culver City Christian Counseling.
Surviving Infidelity through Christian Counseling
One of the hardest decisions to make in processing infidelity is whether or not to salvage the marriage or discuss going separate ways. Impulsive decisions can have devastating consequences, so it is important to talk things through. At Culver City Christian Counseling, we promote the mindset that recovery is possible because we believe that through Christ, all things are possible.
Christian Counseling’s Practices for Recovery After Infidelity
The inexplicable divide caused by infidelity can be catastrophic to a marriage. We offer Christian counseling for infidelity recovery to give both spouses involved a neutral ground to discuss the many complicated emotions that can be involved in this delicate issue. We lean on Christ as our foundation for guiding couples to healing.
The damages caused by infidelity are like that of trauma. To fight the adverse effects that arise from infidelity, the goal of Christian counseling is to strip marriages down to the core, revealing the foundation they were built on in the first place: honesty, trust, and a commitment to this lifelong partnership founded in faith in God. This can be achieved by:
- Building a safer environment: The betrayed must be made to feel safe within the relationship and the home environment. The affair must be completely cut off, and each spouse must use open communications to discuss reasons the affair occurred and how to move forward.
- Honesty: The discovery of an affair can be very difficult and lead to many questions and concerns. Full disclosure regarding the affair is best in a controlled environment with a counselor to avoid an altercation of any kind while working through the issues in a respectful and understanding manner.
Rebuilding Trust After Infidelity
Nobody can be sure of their potential reaction to infidelity until it actually happens. Rebuilding trust inevitably takes time and patience, but as we’ve said before – through Christ, all things are possible. God has a reason for each obstacle that comes your way in life, including infidelity. Through His guidance, marriages can be made stronger than ever, even after the debilitating aftermath of an affair. They can be made whole again through redemption and restoration. Trust in Christ is key to making your marriage bond stronger and finding light in this dark situation. With this in mind, some ways for spouses to rebuild trust are:
- Be accountable: Involved spouses must realize that their actions were wrong and they must empathize with the emotions of the spouse that has been betrayed.
- Be willing to get hurt: Part of recovering from infidelity is re-opening the heart despite all of the risks of hurt in the future. Fear will eventually subside if the involved individual remains dedicated to restoring trust.
- Communicate and ask questions: It is imperative that the involved spouse answers questions about the affair, and that the betrayed spouse learn ways to ask questions in a healthy and non-confrontational manner.
- Set realistic goals: Even though it is difficult, the betrayed individual needs to understand that forgiveness and healing from infidelity are long processes. New information may come out during counseling, which can make the betrayed spouse feel even worse. It is important to realize that the involved spouse feels guilty and is repentant and striving to do the right things. The involved spouse, however, must also have realistic expectations of the marriage going forward because some of these may have caused the affair.
- Forgiveness: After infidelity, Christian counseling can give hope to both individuals and help them work towards new beginnings and renewed love instead of focusing on the hurt one or both individuals have caused.
Part 4: Forgiveness and New Beginnings
It wasn’t easy, but through Christian counseling for infidelity recovery and reconnection with Christ, Angela and Scott repaired the damage to their marriage. Scott gained a better understanding of himself and what led him to be unfaithful. He also knew he never wanted to hurt Angela again. Angela learned that she was not to blame and that she was all Scott really wanted. The end result was a new beginning based on compassion, understanding, and forgiveness with newfound hope for their future together.
If you are ready to recover from infidelity, Culver City Christian Counseling is here to help. Christian counseling may be the progressive step forward that your marriage needs to step out of the darkness and into the light again.