Encouraging Bible Verses for Couples

Relationships are a blessing. As social creatures, humans come with a baked-in hankering for relationships of all sorts. “So God created humanity in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them,” says the early chapters of Genesis.

Created in God’s image, we mirror who God is – God is love, we are told later in the New Testament; no wonder finding love and showing love feels so good and so right.

Of course, we now live in a world where sin has marred the good and beautiful things of the world, including our relationships.

The Bible helps us to navigate relationships in this complicated space so we can still be blessed as we conduct our relationships. This article will delve into the relationship that couples have, sharing some verses that contain wisdom for our flourishing in this regard.

Bible Verses for Couples

Grow together

It’s been said that the family that prays together, stays together. There’s truth to that chestnut. A crucial part of your growth as a person is your spiritual growth. As you “seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness” (Matthew 6:33) and pursue growing more and more in maturity as you follow Jesus, that’s a journey to share with your spouse and your family. Inasmuch as each person’s journey is their own, as a couple, you also want to be pursuing godliness together so that you keep pulling in the same direction.

Listen well

One of the keys to a successful relationship with your significant other is to be a good listener. Great communication enables you to be aware of where your partner is emotionally and mentally, and this, in turn, helps you to know how best to be present and supportive of them.

A great verse that challenges us all in this respect comes from the letter written by James, the brother of Jesus. He writes, “…let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19). This Scripture cuts against the grain – we’re usually quick to speak, eager to be heard and our irritation or frustration isn’t far from being exposed.

Real listening that is empathetic and truly engaged, is a rare find. Slowing down and really listening to your partner is a real gift for any relationship. It allows you to know the points of need for your spouse, and how best to love them.

Forgiveness required

As children of Adam, we have a predisposition to sin. We don’t listen as well as we should, we don’t take out the garbage as we promised, we forget anniversaries and are sulky during visits to the in-laws. Whatever it might be, there will always be a need for forgiveness, and a need to ask for forgiveness. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).

Couples need to be willing to forgive one another because sins will be committed. What’s interesting about this verse is that we’re asked to forgive the way that God in Christ forgave us. That’s an impossibly high bar, but it encourages humility. Is there anything that your spouse has done to you that you haven’t done even worse to God and been forgiven for? It certainly puts things into perspective.

Enjoy one another

When you got together with your spouse, one likely reason is that you enjoyed each other – whether it was the conversation, shared hobbies or interests. Whatever it was, it needs to be nurtured and given room to continue growing. As you get older, you mature and change as some of your priorities shift or your thinking about certain topics develops.

Take the time to keep sharing yourself with your spouse so you grow together. Throughout your marriage, but perhaps especially as life gets busy with kids and other responsibilities, a regular Date Night should be a mainstay and priority of your life as a couple.

The book of Proverbs, a collection of ancient wisdom about how to live life well, has this little gem in it – “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe… be intoxicated always in her love” (Proverbs 5:18-19).

Though addressed to men, the same sentiment could be directed the other way around. Enjoying one another and staying intoxicated in each other’s love is what keeps a marriage alive. Speaking tender words to one another continuously and laughing together is like life-giving water in a desert.

Delighting or rejoicing in one another is also about enjoying one another sexually as well. These are Paul’s words of advice to married people – “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (1 Corinthians 7:5).

Married folk are to share themselves with their spouse, a spontaneous and intimate act of self-giving to the other, for the other. This beautiful picture of sex celebrates how God made us and the person given to us to enjoy it with.

Respect the marriage bed

In line with that last verse, a couple ought to respect their marriage bed. This means their bodies are only for one another, and third parties aren’t invited to the celebration, whether in person or virtually. “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous” (Hebrews 13:4).

God is concerned about the integrity of your marriage, and one way to maintain that integrity is to put a cordon around your sex life. Think of the marriage bed like a high-end private garden with an exclusive lifetime membership of two. Other people may know of the garden’s existence, but there are no plus ones and they aren’t invited to take part in what goes on there.

Don’t let anger create a wedge

In the verse from James mentioned earlier, the idea of being slow to anger came up. There are things that your husband or wife does that frustrate or anger you. As justified as that anger might be, what you do with it matters. If you let it build up and fester unresolved, it can create a wedge in the relationship.

Have you ever had a fight go on for so long that you forget what the fight was about in the first place? The fight takes on a life of its own. “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil” (Ephesians 4:26-27).

Being angry isn’t necessarily evil, it’s often a legitimate emotional response to a situation. That anger shouldn’t lead you into character assassination of your spouse, or emotional and physical abuse. And it’s wise to put a cap on that anger in terms of how long you take before you deal with the issue.

Some people need to withdraw to process their feelings, while others want to engage directly with the other person. Whatever your style of conflict management is, there is wisdom in not letting the sun go down on your anger (which I take to mean not letting the anger burn endlessly). That anger can be used by the devil to insinuate untrue thoughts about your partner into your mind, or it can turn into an affair with someone else.

Conclusion

Relationships are a joy. Living as we do after the Genesis 3 rebellion, we live in a world where there are many obstacles to good relationships. These obstacles come from a variety of sources, but the Bible gives us wisdom on how to begin overcoming them.

God gives us the grace to love and forgive one another, to persevere and preserve our relationships. One of God’s blessings to us is that we can, in his strength, steer our relationships toward health and flourishing.